I feel like most of you know what catfish means as in terms of dating, right? If not, check out this show stat from MTV and then get back over here. So, anyway, I have been dating online for years. I did it in my 20s, then I was married to Jay for the entirety of my 30s {who I also met online} and now, at 40, I am doing online dating again. Well, I was. I no longer have any online dating profiles but, before I removed my profiles, I did manage to get catfished. I also got catfished once in my 20s, too, but this recent one is better, so let’s have storytime! Speaking of liars, be sure to check out Rafe’s article on dating and dishonesty if you haven’t already.
The Case Of The Catfish
So, when I first started this 40s version of online dating a few months ago, I went out with several different guys once or twice. Then I started dating this paramedic for a few months on and off, which was part of the reason I closed down my online dating profiles initially. When the paramedic and I called it quits for good, I decided to try again. Enter the catfish.
So, I have to say, I deleted everything from this weirdo and blocked him all over social media, so I can’t really share with you the timeline, but I can say, this all went down over the course of a few days. Since he lied about his name, I am going to just go ahead and use his fake name to make things easier. “Nick” contacted me on a dating app and we talked for a few days and decided to meet. According to “Nick,” he was from Long Island, NY, and currently lives in Lexington {I think}. During our few phone conversations, I thought he had a very Central American accent so I did ask him a couple times if he was originally from Long Island and he assured me that he was. So, I took him at his word. I added “Nick” on Facebook as I like to check out guys on Facebook and/or Google before I meet them because I am not trying to get murderized and such. His profile only had a few pictures and a few friends. In retrospect, I feel this was a red flag that I just chose to ignore. Where were Nev and Max when I needed them?
Oh nevermind, I see where they were.
Anyway, I met this joker one Friday night at Starbucks. We were going to see Justice League and he was like 45 minutes late. No more Justice League, ugh. Then he decided that we would still see a movie and that movie would be Wonder. He decided. All by himself. I was already starting to not feel this dude but I went along anyway.
Mama don’t get dressed up for nothing. Brooks and Dunn know what’s up.
Everything was all fine and good in the movie except for the fact that “Nick” was annoying AF! He apparently had one hella cold and kept coughing and rattling his cough drop bag and wrappers and kept squeezing the water bottle that he apparently smuggled into the theater. And he kept talking. During the movie. A lot. Dude, I want to watch the movie! People kept giving him “the look.” I was so ready to leave. I gotta say that movie was really good, though. What I saw of it. 😀
Anyway, we head back to Starbucks and “Nick” orders a drink. When asked for his name by the barista, “Nick” says his name is Luis {maybe that’s his real name, maybe not, who knows?}. Anyway, I am wondering why he used the name Luis to get his drink and I think I asked him about it when we sat down.
So, Nick/Luis’ story went something like how he was terrified that someone would steal his identity so he used a fake name to make sure the women he meets online are safe. Then he whipped out his credit card and license to show me his name was, in fact, Luis. So much for being scared that I would steal his identity with his credit card number on full display and all. *judgement face* And that address on his license was so not Lexington. Ironically, his dad’s name was Nick {maybe, maybe not} so he stole his dad’s identity to make a fake dating profile and fake Facebook in order to protect his own identity. *huge eyeroll*
Even more ironically, dude was actually the dude in the pics. But who knows if anything else he said was true. Turns out this joker is from El Salvador and assured me he was, in fact, a US Citizen though I did not ask. Sure, dude. I believe everything you say at this point. He asked me out again and I politely refused. I went home and he messaged me all night asking me back out. No thanks, What’s Your Face. I ended up blocking him on everything and haven’t heard from him since. As of a few minutes ago, his fake Facebook is still up, though.
Shocker.
Have You Ever Been Catfished?
If you have been catfished, I would love to hear your story! Be sure to share in the comments below!
I was Catfished once back in college! Mine was a lot scarier but I think any sort of thing can really creep one out and just make you feel disgustingly vunerable!
Oh no! I hate that yours was scary. My guy was actually kind of charming aside from acting a fool at the movie theater and all the lying and such, lol. Glad you are ok!
I’ll tell you a good catfish story. Guys are always contacting through facebook, they all have the same story either their wife was killed in a car accident or had cancer and died and they are easing their only child themself. They have no family, usually are enineers working out of the Country for a couple months but live in the US. So I ask for a picture of them sometimes when they contact. The last one said he would send me a picture of himself. Well I got the picture, and it was a picture of my son. I played along as my son has had dozens and dozens of guys using his picture I guess because he is a military guy and successful. Well I asked for another picture and he send one of my son and my daughter’s son when he was little and said it was his child. Then I blocked him. My son has contacted facebook lots of times about people using his picture, but they can’t do anything as there people are usually in Kenya or places like that.
EWWWWW it’s funny but at the time it was probably so aggravating!
XO Ellen from Ask Away
http://www.askawayblog.com
Holy cow! I’ve never been catfished. Thankfully, I met my husband before the days of online dating! It’s a crazy weird jungle out there.
I love the show Catfish but I’m sorry this happened to you. At least you figured it out!
I saw the original Catfish movie and loved it but have not watched the show. You have to be so careful and always protect yourself primarily. I am so glad to be married and not dating for these reasons.
Online dating sounds super scary. I love to watch catfish, but I hate seeing the people who get catfishes, makes my heart hurt.
I know. Some of these people have been “dating” their catfishes online for years and then “surprise!” it’s a middle aged dude instead of a 20 something female. Sheesh! That’s why I might people quick.
I’ve heard some crazy catfish stories. I’m sorry this happened to you. Its helpful to share the stories so that other people are aware of what to watch out for.
Yikes! It’s difficult enough to date without worrying about something like Catfishing. That is a funny story though.
It really is, isn’t it. It’s pretty recent but dude wasn’t scary at all. Just super dumb. I mean, if I was going by an alias, I wouldn’t be dumb enough to give the jig up to the barista. Oh my, lol!
It is so funny that these people think others wont notice. I still say at least he was a guy and not a woman, or kids really messing around!
It is so funny that these people think others wont notice. I still say at least he was a guy and not a woman, or kids really messing around!!
What a story! WOW! That is crazy! It is hard to date without catfishing (which I think is SUCH a weird name LOL). I am glad that you have moved on and found what you are looking for!
Oh yikes! What a bad date. I supposed for every good date there are going to be a handful of bad ones.
I use to love watching this show. I don’t have cable anymore, so I don’t get to really see it. I have never been catfished, but I love following all these stories.
I understand being cautious online until you meet someone but this is just an awful thing to do to someone. How can you possibly trust anyone who does this? Ugh.
Right!? I can’t believe he asked me out again after that. There is no way I would ever believe anything that he ever said again. *shakes head*
Uggg…. so tough to date and have to worry about this stuff. Technology is a good and bad thing.
Some people can be so creepy. I couldn’t imagine venturing into the world of online dating.
Wow, scary! People are so dang creepy. I am happy I haven’t had to deal with any catfish type of scams.
Yikes! That’s totally creepy! It’s hard to trust anyone you meet online these days. Glad you figured it out.
PS. I love the Catfish show! 🙂
Omg I’ve never heard of the Catfish movie before. Now I need to check it out!
Ugh online dating to me is so scary, regardless of how many ppl I know who have success. I am glad this didn’t turn out worse.