Former waitress here. I have been sitting back, considering writing about this subject for a few years now. I waitressed in the 90s and early 2000s. I started serving in my late teens and continued all throughout my 20s. And, I must say, of all the jobs that I have had, of those that I no longer do, waitressing is probably the one that I miss the most. It just seemed like you had so much control over how much money you made. You were paid what you were worth, so to speak. You worked hard, you made well. You stood around and twiddled your thumbs, you didn’t. Seems fair to me. Granted, these are just my opinions and you might not agree but, as someone with over a decade of waitressing experiencing, I feel my opinion is well earned.
Tipping Culture Has Gotten Out Of Hand
I made $2 and change an hour. $2. Tips were a supplement to my income to ensure that I made a “living” wage. Honestly, in the end, I felt I made pretty good and I worked hard and picked up extra shifts where I could to be sure of that. You can say what you want about how employers should pay more so that tips aren’t a necessity for the server, but that is not really what I am here to discuss today. Perhaps we will dig into that topic another day. But for now, I want to have an open discussion about how expectations have changed where it concerns tipping in the past few years.
The Pandemic’s Effect On Tipping
During the pandemic, many companies could no longer provide all of the services they did previously. Many companies had to take on extra duties and work harder to provide the same level of service. There were so many businesses with vastly fewer employees than what they needed to handle the ever growing workload. Companies started asking for tips to help supplement their missing income due to loss of income where people were not utilizing services as often or in the same ways as they did pre-pandemic. Tips were asked for to help ensure employees made a decent wage. And customers gladly provided them.
Fast forward to today and many of these same companies are still asking for tips. I can’t tell you how many times I have been asked for a tip somewhere that never would have requested one before. The most obvious violator to me is when the little kiosk screen is turned around, with the tip generally already highlighted to auto add unless I remove it – for something as simple as handing me a drink over a counter or a t-shirt at a concert. I get asked for tips for almost every food or drink purchase I make, regardless of whether anyone did anything outside of typical cashier or fast food work. I, too, have years of experience running cash registers – a job I was never once offered a tip for, nor did I expect one. And I certainly did not ask.
Tipping Need Vs.Tipping Want
I guess what irks me is that many of these people already make decent money – at least when you compare them to wait staff. For instance, a quick scan of Google shows me that the average Starbucks barista in North Carolina makes over $30,000 yearly. For an entry level job that requires no formal education, I feel that is a decent wage. To contrast, when I was a salesperson, I made around that as my starting wage but I made more when I made sales. I did not make more just for doing what I was already paid to do. That’s not to throw Starbucks employees under the bus, that’s just a quick example of a place that I am always prompted to tip. We don’t tip fast food workers to do essentially the same job. Why then are we expected to tip baristas? Why also am I asked once by the barista and then again on the app? I never once asked for a tip as a waitress.
The most I ever made in company wages for being a server was $4.25 an hour. And that was for working the overnight shift that most any company would pay you a “premium” for being willing to work. $4.25 an hour. Again, I waited tables in the late 90s and early 2000s. Today, waitresses in many states still only make $2.13 an hour. Many, many years later. So, servers need the tip income to supplement their wages to make a decent amount of money. You might say, get a different job. And you have a point. Wait staff do choose to take on these positions, for a variety of reasons. But, ask yourself, do you really want wait staff to take on different professions? Do you really want to never be able to go out to eat and be served your food again? Are fast food service and drive-thrus alone really good enough for the rest of your life? I personally love to go out to eat, relax, and interact with a great server. And I like to tip them and show gratitude for their hard work.
The Entitlement Is Real
I feel like tipping, across the board, should be a choice and not something that we are incessantly requested to do. The entitlement is getting out of hand with some people. I can’t forget about the bridal store that almost demanded someone leave an exorbitant tip on a $10,000 dress. A bridal store that sets their own prices, so why would there be a need for a tip to supplement? I am all for tipping where there is a need to supplement an income, and I am all for tipping when I just choose to do so, but I am not for tipping in a situation where I feel there is an entitlement. I cannot tell you how many times someone has turned the little white screen around to me and mentioned leaving a tip. Many people feel this is a high pressure situation where the cashier or salesperson is staring at you, perhaps people in line behind you are looking as well and you have two choices: tip or look like a cheapskate. It’s gotten to where for me, personally, I have stopped going to many of the places that use this high pressure tactic to “force” a tip out of me. And remember, this is coming from a former waitress. Even as a waitress, who depended on tips to even make minimum wage, I never would have dreamed of employing this level of pressure to “force” a tip.
Tipping Fatigue & Consumer Pushback
All of this, let’s call it what it is, intimidation, is leading to what people are calling “guilt tipping.” Many patrons now feel like tipping has become less of a way of showing appreciation and more of an annoyance. And the majority of patrons are sick of it. Many of these people have stopped tipping anywhere. That means that wait staff who depend on this money are getting the shaft. I totally understand the feeling of tipping fatigue. I am right there with you, but please remember, some professions rely on tips to even be able to pay their bills. If you are going to pushback and stop tipping, please consider doing a little research about who actually needs the tip money to supplement their less than minimum wage income and be sure to tip accordingly.
What do you think? Has tipping culture got out of hand? Are you a server? Have you noticed a difference in tipping due to pushback? Let us know in the comments below or on social media.
